Charade

Charade

She knew she could no longer keep up the charade forever. She needed to take extreme steps. Those could be terminal ones. She prepared for her last ditched effort. It was a do or die situation for her. She was deeply and madly in love with him. There was no way in which he could marry her. He already had a wife and two children. She decided that she had to end this once and for all.

He was indebted to his wife since she had been with him all throughout his depressive period of life. She helped him with his education and in job as well. They fell in love and were married. Then there were children. Two of them, but one was autistic.
The autistic child forced the couple to decide on who should stay at home. She quit her job so that she could take good care of the child. It was surely the right decision from her point of view. But he missed all the excitement after the birth of this child. His wife was never the same. She was always worried about the young one. She had made it her obsession in life. In in the throes of deep passion, she would suddenly show her maternal instinct and run towards the child. As if the chore is over. He started resenting that behavior.
Money was also the bone of contention between them. There was a time where double income came in their hands and they had a comfortable life style but now, it was too cramped. With a single income coming inwards and the expenses skyrocketing the purse strings were controlled by her. He never had any freedom to splurge any money on himself. Then there was the mortgage to pay for. Life was never going to be a bed of roses ever.
Outwardly, both showed resilience and restraint. The show for the world was in place. A very devoted couple on display. They attended every occasion and festival in the county. The neighbors too saw a very devoted couple dedicated thoroughly to their own brood. The autistic child was put in a special school with proper facilities and trained staff. The mother attended every want and need of the child. She hovered around him like a bee towards a flower. The husband did attend every PTA meeting and he showed his deepest love for that child. He was diligent in his parental duties and responsibilities.
But the strain was too much. He could never ever get a wife again. His wife would always remain a mother of an helpless child. There would never be another honeymoon period in his life ever again. His career was moving along smoothly but his personal life was completely disarrayed and beyond repair.

She arrived like a whiff of wild flowers on a cold morning. He saw her cursorily. It was not as if she was the epitome of beauty but she had her inner glow to compliment her fair skin. She was young and vivacious, full of verve and energy.
He hardly remembers what actually transpired. But one day he found himself confronting her. She had power in her voice and spoke very forcibly. He knew she could be a good asset in his work. He could employ her in his team. She had the talent and the energy needed to run his marketing setup. She had perfect communication skills and poise. Her mannerisms were the right foil for client servicing. Clients always looked out for the perfect communicator. They had to convey the exact meaning to the agency and if they could have the ‘made for the position’ person, their job was half done.
Then the meetings started and late night outs too. Business meeting were more dinner and drinks affairs. The clients preferred after office hours than during stressful office timings.
Travels became frequent and outside home drops a norm.
During one such lengthy client meetings, they was expected to stay over at the hotel. Since it went on deeper into the night, there was no way in which she could go back to her house.
The inevitable was bound to happen. Two souls seeking deeper relationships and meanings in life can never help themselves at all when destiny brings them together.
Intense emotions erupted and what followed was an entire night of love making. From then onwards the meetings ended early but their trysts were far extended.
They had both fallen deeply and madly in love. This kind of love has no meaning, yet it does in an esoteric sense. There is always the want and the desires to be fulfilled. What you cannot get from one becomes the reason for the other to follow.
They had gone beyond the scope of human reason or conscience. The path was downhill only. Tumbling deeper into the chasm of lustful behavior the two seemed to enjoy their secret life.
The truth hit him hard when she demanded more than he could offer. Relationships can never be platonic or like the booty calls. They always end up messing each other. The demands were innocuous and silly, yet they grew by proportions. He could never fulfill any of them. He was seeking solace and comfort but she was seeking a meaningful relationship. There was a terrible mismatch and she got upset ever so often with his one off responses.
Reason left her completely and she could never see what he ever wanted. She could never fathom why he was so much devoted to his wife or children! She knew his relationship with his wife was less meaningful. She couldn’t understand why he continued to cling to his family. They were only offering him pain and troubles, then why was he so much concerned with them? He never spent any money on her. The only time she remembered him giving something to her was only some gifts which one of their client had gifted to him. She knew he always put the hotel bills as business expenses which he was entitled to but on his own he never did spend. One day she confronted him and he paled in front of her. His finances were always handled by his wife and he never had a free hand. There was always the threat of the autistic child.
Their fights became longer and drawn. He could no longer handle her like before. He was seeking every opportunity to take her out of his team. He could no longer bear her barbs and vitriolic talks. He had to either take a transfer or to get her off his team. He waited for the opportunity.
It came one day in the form of a promotion. He could take up the assignment abroad. The Tokyo office needed a branch head. But his major problem was how to break it to her! That too happened suddenly. A client in USA wanted someone to fly down to address his issues and she was deputed for that.
First, She broke the news to him apologetically. She hardly knew his plans for the Tokyo move. He played it like a hurt lover. Someone who was going to miss his love of life. She left for the States and he went to drop her. The fights were forgotten and they had a fabulous love making session before her departure. Her program got extended for four months.
First there were meaningful messages and the missing you’s badly. Then it went passionate and later bland. Life became distant and tiring. Communications which were daily became stretched weekly. He informed her about the opportunity in Tokyo and after a long battle and promises that she would join him there, they settled. He knew that could never happen. It was in his hands whom he could get on board or not. Now he had more powers and the Yen was a perfect foil. He could make money and had sufficient controls in hand.
He could come to the HQ whenever he needed and then there were the usual trysts and fights too. The accusations and violent lovemaking were intermingled. There was always the hope for some meetings. The relationship was not ending. He sincerely hoped that she would fall out of love with him and fall in love with someone else. But it never happened.
He went back to Tokyo and she was all alone. He had called her names. What hurt her the most was him telling her that she knew very well it was just a no strings attached relationship but she had seen too much in it.
The greatest disaster was him saying that he never loved her or could love her in the first place and that he was just using her for sex alone. That was the most hurtful statement he could ever make.
Now there was nothing to look forward to. It was fruitless wait for her. She knew she could love no one else ever again. She knew what she was about to do.

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