So confused

Why is man so confused while making decisions in life? Why does he lose focus about things that really matter the most? Instead of attacking the main subject, why does he behave so irrationally?

A man has a very bad childhood, where he is never accepted at all by his own blood parents. He is always blamed as a mistake and is told that they should have aborted him. He is made to feel like a terrible miscast. Later on he is given for adoption but the scars runs deep. He focuses on other things to get to a better position. Then he behaves erratically with his own children and people around him. He abuses his own kids and wife. His employees and servants too feel his uncontrollable wrath.

A wife undergoes severe beatings and physical torture at the hands of her husband. There is no love or compassion in the marriage. Every single day is a torture. She dreads him coming home and she believes that sleeping next to him is the highest form of punishment that she is getting from god. Life becomes unbearable and she curses him every single day of her life. Though she never expresses it to him, she secretly wants out of the torture chamber of marriage.

One day she is able to extricate herself and her kids out of it and thanks the stars. After her divorce, she believes she has got rid of her problems but soon realizes that he is never going to let her live in peace.
Every single day she lives in dread after that. Either she is afraid that her kids may be taken away from her or he may come back once again. She blocks out the pain and torture and busies herself by helping others. Then the hurt and pain shows up at another place instead. She removes it out on the society and one particular person. That is her battering ram or a place to vent out.

A student had got into the bad books of a professor right in the first year of college. Every single year, the results are going downhill due to this professor who never gives good reviews to this student. Due to his bias the student doesn’t get selected or gets scholarships or admissions at other progressive institutions due to bad ratings. He scrapes out in the last year with a mediocre performance only. The student knows that his professor is the main reason for his poor performance and pathetic results.

He turns his attention towards his employment and is one of the worst employees in the organization. Later in retaliation he judges his downlines with contempt. He puts spokes in his downlines career growth.
In all the above three examples, you noticed that the person has completely lost the main essence of his or her own anger towards the right person and has directed it to some other being. Losing focus of the subject and deliberately pointing it towards another is the way of expression of every individual undergoing suppression. You notice the boss getting upset for no rhyme or reason on you. You say that he must have had a bad morning driving to work or his spouse must have fought with him earlier.

Man has to learn to see the issue right into the eye and not get distracted from it. If the main cause of your unhappiness is your childhood or ex-husband or whosever, then it is important you face the person and not distract yourself. Your enemy is your wrongdoer alone, then why take out your anger on some other individual? It is important to focus your pent up anger on that person itself and not others.

In the Mahabharata, Shri Krsna tells Arjuna that he needs to take up the fight with Duryodhan and other Kauravas. Krsna doesn’t allow Arjuna to forgive or forget his enemies. Even after fourteen years of vanvas or exile, when Arjuna talks of complacency, forgiving and forgetting the insults and deprivation caused to the Pandavas, Krsna gets very angry and directs Arjuna to fight.

The entire premise of The Bhagvad Gita is to do your inborn duty or swadharma and never shy away from it. The grand idea about forgiving and forgetting the atrocities done to you can cause a loop in the karma in your future lives. This can take you eons of life and death to completely get out of the cycle of karma.

In every single example above the main protagonist wants to get out of the relationship and run away never to face the same person again. But fate decrees otherwise. To close the loop in the system, you will have to be born again to clear off the debt of karma only with that individual alone. If someone had beaten you blue in some life, you will have to beat the same person in some other life. And here you had never ever wanted to see that person again in this or any other life. What an irony!!!

So Krsna tells Arjuna to square off right in this life and get over with it right here and now. Never carry grudges or anger forward. Never misdirect it on others, otherwise they too will do the same to you in some other life of theirs.

Krsna gives various methods to overcome that misdemeanor or actions happening to you. When one learns from a qualified Master how to circumvent the karma, they will be able to free themselves from the cycle of birth and deaths. So Krsna advises methodologies and tricks to get out of the sins.

So now go and learn them from a qualified teacher or Guru and never get entangled with anyone or anything hereafter.

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